Weeping over me

“Jesus was troubled in spirit and testified,
“I tell you the truth, one of you is going to betray me”
(John 13:21)

How that must have hurt You – the knowledge of what was to come.

One of Your close and trusted team about to sell You into the hands of those waiting for an opportunity to kill you. Another of them – in fact the leader of the group – about to deny even knowing You. And most of the others soon to flee into the darkness, re-appearing only as onlookers in the great and naked tragedy of Your crucifixion.

Soon You would be quite alone. Having faced and prayed away Your tempter in the Garden of Gethsemane Your arrest and trial would begin.

We only get glimpses of Your feelings. We know You wept outside the tomb of Lazerus. We know You wept again looking over Jerusalem from the Mount of Olives. Now we are told only that You were ‘troubled in spirit’ and the rest is left to our imagination. But it must have been agony – a deep, soul-baring emptiness, bathed in the soundless rain of heart-wept tears, and the silent echoes of the empty words of the crowds and of Your friends around You.

Down through the ages You have watched us come and go, and come back and go, and come and go. We do it so easily and with such little concern – forgetting that You watch and wait. Some will return and stay whilst others will disappear into the darkness of the world. And so many play games with the unfaced reality of eternity – and confuse legalisms for relationships. It’s easier that way – for the law doesn’t weep when we ignore it.